I have just finished Watamote - No Matter How I Look at It, It's You Guys' Fault I'm Not Popular!
I loved it a lot, although I still haven't read the mangá nor watched the OVA (I'll do it shortly). If you have no idea what this anime is about, it's the story of a socially anxious and neurotic girl, Tomoko, diving into high school. She starts high school with high hopes that she'll be popular and someday find a boyfriend.
Did I mention that Tomoko is a socially awkward teenager? Well, obviously this fact comes to throw a wrench to our hero's arc. In every episode, Tomoko tries really hard to deal with her painfully well represented social anxiety while going through her daily high schooler life. And when you're a high schooler, you're probably dealing with a lot of things in your life, but mostly wanting to fit in, being horny and full of hormones, and, of course, not wanting to face the cold reality of the next years of your life.
High school is the first day of the rest of your days.
Tomoko is painfully relatable to me - not just because of her social anxiety. It's more about how anxiety makes us do convoluted shit to get rid of situations that make us face it right on. She keeps making these strange plans that are stupid and make you cringe and feel physical pain because you know they'll turn out badly. But you know, deep inside, that you've been through similar plans before.
Tomoko reminds me of the pre-transition me. I was this geeky person who didn't know they had autism. Autism makes it hard to have regular social connections with more typical people, and even atypical people might not match your special interests anyways. Mixing unrestricted internet access, rejection, painful loneliness, toxic masculinity, hormones, horniness, this is enough to make one want to kill themselves or be harmful to others.
Like Tomoko, I would feel rage against the others. The world wasn't fit for me because other people were bad. But maybe I was being a bitch. After some time, I started to turn most of my rage onwards instead.
Looking at yourself through this binary idea is not productive - you're either bitching or people are really bad and they reject you. But I'm 27 now, high school is way back in the past and I know better than to be like this. I ditched the binary outlook in life. I started to realize that people are complex and that everyone has their own complexities. And I have my complexities. The diagnoses came around - autism and bipolar disorder, which explained years of social anxiety, weird behaviours, explosions and suicidal thoughts. And I started working around them.
I now know I'm transgender. I constantly think that, if I knew that in high school, life would've been easier. I keep romanticizing my life as an autistic, trans girl. Would I have had my first kiss in high school, would boys or girls want to date me. Would I feel prettier?
I feel pretty now.
But, just like Tomoko says in one of the episodes, one cannot change the past. It's gone, it's over. Aside from that, let's face reality - if I knew I was trans as a teen, I'd probably have killed myself at some point. I still haven't killed myself, as of 2026, so that's a win.
I used to have a lot of social anxiety even as a functional adult, who used to go to a corporate job and meet people at the office. But now, after I started getting more comfortable with myself, life feels a little more bearable and less lonesome. I have more friends now, I know a lot of people, I feel like I'm easygoing most of the time.
Maybe if you start understanding yourself, life gets better. And sometimes you have to accept some things.
Anyways, Watamote is enjoyable. It's a slice of life (kinda). I love this kind of anime. There are some dark moments, there are some sad moments, some funny ones if you're into cringy situations. And Tomoko is fascinating, as a character that I feel that is very relatable. This is why she's in my "She's so me" section btw.
